Monday, 6 September 2010

I swear it's alive.

I swear every computer is maliciously alive. I know all internet providers and website servers are. And they all conspire to give me hell. It’s the wasted time which drives me mad with frustration and irritates the hell out of me.

I know I follow the instructions carefully and to the letter. As a long time educator, tutor, professor and teacher I do understand the importance of reading instructions and following them exactly. I am also capable of asking questions and then using the information in the answers correctly.

I swear computer people seem unaware that they speak a weird jargon. They also seem unable to turn their instructions into simple steps. I find I am expected to automatically have gone through three or four stages before the instructions apply. Once the technobabble is translated into real English why is that when I do stages one, two and three, the result is not what it is supposed to be? Said expert trots along and does exactly the same steps and the result is perfect.

What annoys me is that all the computer experts simply smirk and all but pat me on the head.
I know it is the malign life form within my computer.